I’ve woken up this morning and a big chunk of reality has punched me in the face.
This weekend Babu is re-joining his ship in the Caribbean. What does this mean exactly for us? It means that until march we will most likely be conducting out entire relationship via text message.
I don’t know, maybe I’ve been too busy, or maybe my brain has been kind to me so far blocking out the reality of what is to come, I honestly have no idea, but it has prompted me to consider- which is the lesser of the two evils? Him being in India for 5 months, never being able to see him but being able to talk on the phone as much as we want? Or, him being at work, with 5 months in the Caribbean where is is really hard to keep in contact, but then another 4 months where we can speak on the phone occasionally and see each other every week/fortnight (schedule dependant)?
I must admit we have got to the point where at the moment he wants to talk to me at least two hours a day, which basically means that along with work and my commute I don’t have time to do anything else, so as much as I do want to talk to him, I’m usually tired and cranky, and sometimes there’s not subject matter for a daily two hour conversation – especially when he’s at home doing nothing most of the day! BUT I understand why he does want to talk that much, took my ignorant brain little while to figure it out, but it is because after next week we won’t be able to talk, maybe even at all, but in my head it just didn’t click for a long time, the reality of the next few months was clear to him much sooner then to I.
And so, this morning it is clearer that anything, that very soon, the dynamics of our relationship are once again about to change, BIG STYLE! I know we will adjust in time, but that’s just it, in time. I’m going to be feeling a bit lost for a little while!
For now, we still have a few days, and maybe if we are lucky his flight may come with a stopover in London this weekend – which would be wonderful, but not getting my hopes up too much.
Welcome to my world….!
(and apologies for all the mushy relationship stuff to anyone who enjoys this blog for other reasons!)