So pretty much 6 months to the day since I left him at the airport in London, we saw each other again.
I waited a very long time for him to come out, there had been a special event that evening and he was working so late, there is a very special VIP coming in a few days so the pressure is on right now. But eventually he came and we sat in my car outside the terminal.
So much has happened in those six months.
I didn’t know if things felt the same or completely different. I was looking at him, scanning his face, trying to figure it out, trying to figure if he is the same man or if all this has changed him – I don’t even know the answer to this question if I made it about myself so there’s not a chance I could figure it out for him.
…he wouldn’t discuss anything, I sat there and cried, he told me not to, tonight is apparently the night for talking. And for the rest of the time we sat and chatted about anything else, but there was certainly an elephant in the car.
The thing is, if he makes the choice not to fight this, I can’t remain in his life – for my own health and sanity – but right now, I am completely sure that neither of us would be ready to let go, so I pray he has that fight in him.